Your Fear of Failure Is Actually Fear of Something Else

"I'm afraid my project will fail." I hear this constantly from talented professionals. They list all the things that could go wrong: a missed deadline, a budget overrun, public embarrassment, a disappointed boss.

But after 25 years in business, I've learned that you're not actually afraid of failure. You're afraid of what failure would mean about you.

The Real Fear Behind "Fear of Failure"

When you dig deeper, the fear is rarely about the practical consequences. Most professionals can survive a project that doesn't work out. What they feel they can't handle is the story that failure would tell about who they are.

They're afraid failure would prove they're not smart enough, not capable enough, or not worthy of the next opportunity. It's not a fear of a business outcome; it's a fear of identity failure.

The Four Hidden Fears

Your "fear of failure" is usually one of these four fears in disguise:

1. Fear of Confirmation: "If I try and fail, it will prove I'm not as capable as I thought I was."
2. Fear of Judgment: "My colleagues will think I was foolish for trying something so risky."
3. Fear of Wasted Identity: "I've spent years building expertise in this area. Starting a new type of project means I'm a beginner again."
4. Fear of Inadequacy: "I'm just not the type of person who succeeds at this kind of thing."

When you misdiagnose the problem as a general "fear of failure," you try to solve it with more research and planning. But you can't research your way out of an identity fear. You can only act your way out of it by Taking Action Despite Fear.

How Successful People Think About Failure

The most resilient and successful professionals don't avoid failure; they just think about it differently.

• Failure is tuition for experience. Every failed attempt teaches you something that can't be learned in a course. You're not losing; you're investing in your own education.
• Failure is competitive research. Most people are too afraid to try, which means there's less competition for those willing to risk a setback.
• Failure is identity strengthening. Each time you try something and it doesn't work out as planned, you prove to yourself that failure isn't fatal. This is how you start Building Confidence to Act Despite Uncertainty.

You are not afraid of your project failing. You're afraid of what that failure would mean. Change what it means, and you'll change what becomes possible.

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FSTEP provides a safe environment to practice failing small. Our weekly challenges are designed to help you build resilience and prove that setbacks aren't fatal. Learn more about the 6-week FSTEP program.

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